President’s Day: The Reckoning

February 15, 2010 (Day 16) — President’s Day: The Reckoning

Forget Valentine’s Day. Arbor Day? It’s a pansy. Christmas? New Years? Thanksgiving? They’ve got nothing on President’s Day. It’s the day when we honor zombie Lincoln and zombie Washington coming back from the dead to free the slaves from taxation without representation while offering universal health care to some and sending the Tories back to Spain where they belong!

With our powers combined! (Source: c-simmons.com and flickr.com respectively. Please don’t sue!)

Or… something like that. Anyway, if there’s one thing our founding fathers loved to do, it was drink. And drink heavy. Just take a look at a few of this choice quotes:

• “Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.” — Benjamin Franklin

• “I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts, and beer.” — Abraham Lincoln

• “I’m f—ed up… Let’s go kill some Indians.” — Andrew Jackson

Okay, maybe Jackson didn’t ACTUALLY say that, but you read up on the guy and try and tell me it didn’t at least cross his mind once — or a dozen — times or so.

Watch out for his pimp hand.

But enough about America’s killingest president (outside Teddy Roosevelt of course). While President’s Day is technically supposed to honor everyone who’s been unlucky enough lead our great country, we tend to focus on two — Washington and Lincoln. And so to me it only made sense that we would have a bevey of information out there on President’s Day-themed cocktails. I was shocked — nay, aghast — at the lack of drinks whereupon I could get schnockered while paying homage to our zombie saviors.

So, I’m nothing if not resourceful. So, may I present to you a Mark Vierthaler original! The President’s Day: The Reckoning

• Dash of grenadine (In honor of Washington’s felled cherry tree)
• 2 oz bourbon (In honor of Lincoln’s log cabin)
• 2 oz apple pie liqueur (Well, hell! What’s more American than apple pie?)

Pour into a rocks glass over ice, stir to mix. Let sit to cool the liquor down a bit. I can’t overstate that enough. While still warm, this drink is less Lincoln and Washington and more Jackson. It’ll kick your ass, then leave you thanking it. Cool it down a bit and it’s a nice desert cocktail.

Blood, like the kind that will run when the wrath of Zombie Washington and Zombie Lincoln break free from their human captors.

It’s pretty good. The sweet bourbon coupled with apple pie liqueur give a nice mix of flavors. The grenadine, at first, seems to be the odd one out. But after the first drink, it compliments the other two flavors quite nicely. If you’re not a fan of bourbon, you won’t be very fond of this drink.

But careful if you haven’t eaten anything before you drink this beast, though. Seriously. It’ll feel like Teddy rode his Rough Riders across your sobriety.

Dude just kicked your ass through this picture.

Genieße das Leben ständig!

Du bist länger tot als lebendig!

— Mark